Worst Case Scenario
by NorthernTrash-x
Summary: Gotei13. In which Yamamoto dies, Ukitake can't finish his report and Central46 has a collective nervous breakdown.


Originally a drabble from one of my collections, this one wouldn't leave me alone until I saw where it would take me.

Includes Ukitake, Kyouraku, Byakuya, Central46 and mentions of a lot of other people.

**Worst Case Scenario**

"Captain Ukitake, what on earth is going on? Has Aizen attacked? Are the arrancar here?"

"Are the troops mobilized for battle? Is everything prepared?"

Ukitake bit his lip. He still wasn't quite sure how to explain this whole mess, even though he held a detailed report in his hands and knew well what events had unfolded and when in the last few hours. He struggled not out of a _lack_ of information, but because what information he had didn't even make too much sense to himself.

"No, no. Nothing like that, they're all still safely in Hueco Mundo. I… well…"

The funeral of Genryusai Shigekuni Yamamoto had taken place that morning, and they all still wore their bands of black around their forearms in memory of the great man. The loss of Yamamoto to the Soul Society was detrimental, it seemed: Central46 had never paid much heed to what would happen if the Captain-Commander were to die. No one had, in all honesty- who would have thought that it could ever happen? Unfortunately, because of this, no plans had been made for what to do in this situation. Yamamoto himself had never made any indication of who should replace him.

Instead, people had talked. And that lead to disagreement, which in turn lead to… well, lets just say that it wasn't pretty. Ukitake rubbed his forehead, and a part of him wished that he hadn't gotten out of his bed that morning. Maybe he could fake an injury. He was pretty sure he had more of those blood capsules that Urahara had sent him. He could just pop on in his mouth and cough and…

No, no. Responsibilities.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, consider the worst case scenario."

The esteemed representatives of Central46 looked down at Captain Jyuushiro Ukitake of the Thirteenth division, perhaps the most responsible of the thirteen, and did consider, just to humour him. They didn't have a lot of imagination between them, and the blank looks on their faces made Ukitake sigh, not for the first nor the last time that day. This really was quite complicated.

"Well, that's happened."

Outside, the war was raging on.

No, not _that_ war. This was something far worse.

"It seems that the thirteen squad Captains have turned on each other in the wake of the Captain Commander's death. Some are trying to seize power, others are trying to stop them from doing so."

A look of bafflement crossed Ukitake's face for a moment before he caught himself and smoothed it away, instead offering the rows of seated men and women a calming smile as he anticipated their next question.

"Although, right now, I must admit that I am somewhat confused about _who_, exactly, is trying to gain control. It's all a bit vague, really."

There was a crash from somewhere close, somewhere perhaps a little too close for the comfort of the assembled group, who stared upwards in a wordless mixture of bewilderment and fear as a light dust of plaster fell. Ukitake rubbed some off his sleeves as a long crack appeared in the ceiling, and resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"I believe that that was the Captain of the Seventh. When I left he was arguing with the Captain of the Second Squad, who was a little impatient with his mourning, and now… well, I err… think she has thrown him."

"And which one of them are we to assume is fighting for command?"

Jyuushiro winced. He really didn't want to get into this part.

"Well, actually… from what I can tell… neither of them, sir."

There was a wave of muttering around the room, words indecipherable but general air of complete bemusement evident.

"Then, Captain, I must ask you- why are they fighting? Not arguing, we are well used to the Gotei13 disagreeing, but we would have assumed that those two had greater composure and self-control than to sink into this sort of going-on."

"Well, I think that they… just got a little carried away."

There was a smell of burning, something corrosive and acidic rather than the distinct odour of smoke and fire, and a sudden chill air swept through as a forceful draught, ruffling the papers on their desks and wrapping his haori around his legs. Jyuushiro wished that there was a seat nearby, because this was all getting rather tiring.

"And that would be the Tenth and Twelfth Captains, from what I can gather. They had started to argue about who would stop Soifon as I was leaving, and it seems it has carried on. I wouldn't worry, though- they've only just drawn their bankai, from the feel of it."

"And why are they accumulating around our building?"

"Well, I don't think that it is intentional."

(Here, Ukitake offered a prayer up to whatever providence was listening that it wasn't intentional, because the only thing that would be more terrifying than a Gotei13 in disarray would be an organised collection of the Gotei13 Captains that were all for once actually working together efficiently and planning on attacking their central leadership system with subterfuge and trickery. Or well, again.)

"I think that they are just following the natural flow of the battle, sir, keeping an eye on their subordinates and so forth."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, from what I can gather it seems that several of the Captains have ordered the seated officers of their division to attack another Captain. I believe on the last count that that fight in particular numbered eighty-two to one."

"Good god! All that many at once?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so."

"Is he injured? The Captain, I mean?"

"Well… no. They sent them against Kenpachi Zaraki. I rather think that he is enjoying himself, at the moment."

There was a pause.

"I see. How… horrific."

Ukitake's face was deadpan as he answered.

"Indeed."

"And what about the Lieutenants? If the Captains are so otherwise engaged, why are they not attempting to restrain their commanding officers in the name of peace and order?"

"Well, I'm rather under the impression that they are enjoying themselves as much as the Captains are."

"_Enjoying themselves, _Captain?"

"Ah, um… well, I mean, they are a little busy as the moment."

"How so?"

"Sasakibe has taken the buildings of the First Division in a siege, and is refusing to come out or to allow anyone entry. I rather think that the grief has got the better of him, you know. He seems to believe than anyone who would try and take over would only destroy the Soul Society, and so attempts to stop that eventuality by keeping people out."

"I see. He might have a point, you know?"

"I believe that his mind has gone a little, sir."

"Ah, well, of course. But, you know, apparently all of our officers are suffering a similar fate, so we can't judge right now. And what of the others?"

"Omaeda of the Second Division is currently unconscious."

"What happened?"

"Well, this event I actually witnessed, so this testimony is fully accurate, rather than just being well advised conjuncture."

"You mean that all of this might not have happened the way that you're telling us? Captain, don't you think that is somewhat unprofessional of you?"

"Well, according to my colleague in the Eighth department-"

"Yo."

Shunusi slid out of the shadows, the bright pink somehow succeeding to camouflage him, regardless of how illogical that might be. Really, though, that wasn't Central46's main concern at that precise moment in time. More than anything else, they were more worried about the tremors that had started shaking the room.

"How did you get in here?"

"Your guards are somewhat distracted, running for cover."

"Back to matters at hand. Captain Kyouraku, if you could wait. Captain Ukitake, continue."

"Kyouraku has seen much more of the action than I have, in this particular… predicament. I have it all on good authority from him, and from what I can sense of their spiritual power."

"Captain Kyouraku, where do you stand in this?"

Shunsui shrugged, a little lazily.

"Not really anywhere. Don't want the old man's spot. Looked like a bit of a drag."

"I… well, errr, fair enough. Anyway, what happened to Omaeda?"

"Oh, his Captain knocked him unconscious. She got a little annoyed at him. Apparently he got jam stains on her haori, I don't know. Something like that, anyway."

"_Thank you_, Captain Kyouraku."

"You're welcome. Oh, I thought you might want to know that it appears that we have invaders. You know, you might want to do something about that."

"What! You came here to tell us that and you waited this long?"

Shunsui shrugged, a long, slow movement of muscle that denied any worry or concern at the situation. There was a silence through the echoing chamber as they waited for him to say something else, and when it became quite clear that he wasn't intending to Ukitake was forced to intervene, part of him still wishing that he hadn't come into the seireitei that morning. Seriously, if he had stayed at home he could have avoided all of this. He had been able to sense the invaders since they had arrived, neither of them trying to hide their spiritual pressure at all, no doubt unconcerned about everyone's reaction when they were trying to fight each other. They appeared to be directing their attention on Hitsugaya and Kurotsuchi at the moment, so he didn't suppose it was too much of an issue.

The silence had turned a little more nervous.

"And… ermm… is Captain Unohana nearby?"

"No, not in the direct proximity. I believe she is still tending to the Sixth, Seventh and Ninth second chairs. I think it has had some additional complications. Nothing to worry about, you know, the usual."

"What the hell happened to them?"

The main voice of the Central46 sounded a little more frantic than he had ten minutes before. Ukitake supposed that the threat of impending doom might do that to a person. Impending doom? Was that too much of an exaggeration? Maybe. No, perhaps, not. Judging by the way that this was going, that wasn't too unlikely an outcome. Any situation that blended inter-departmental warfare always risked the destruction of all the known worlds. Just one of the dangers of the job.

"Well, they have been engaged with the third and fifth seat from the Eleventh. They're all currently unconscious."

"Is no one loyal to their comrades?" The man was obviously despairing.

"Oh, no, sir. I believe this is testament to the alcohol poisoning they conceded to last night."

"Are we full of drunkar-"

"Yes. Yes we are."

The man eyed Kyouraku, who was still lounging against the wall, hat tilted upwards and a shadow cast across eyes that might have been bloodshot, but it was hard to tell. He rubbed his forehead, and decided not to comment. As if noticing that he was being watched, Shunsui tipped two fingers in the direction of the assembled men and women. There was a massive crash from outside, splintering the roof even further, and crystalline fingers of ice crept through. The ice was somewhat a giveaway.

"Is that Captain Hitsugaya?"

Ukitake rolled his shoulders. He could hear his zanpakuto murmuring in his mind, and it was something of a distraction. No, he didn't care that it wanted to fight. He himself wanted to sleep- _you just can't always get what you want in life! Now shut up in my head!_

"Ah, I think so."

"Is he still fighting Captain Kurotsuchi?"

Shunsui shook his head, deciding to be uncharacteristically helpful. Don't be fooled that he was being useful- he just found their reactions to the escalating situations quite amusing.

"Judging by the reiatsu I can sense, I think he is currently fighting Yoruichi Shihoin."

"The hell is she doing here! Is she trying to take over, as well?"

"She's one of the intruders we discussed earlier. And no, I think she's just here to have some fun. Kisuke Urahara's here, too, by the way."

"Public Enemy, Kisuke Urahara? One of the most dangerous men alive? He's invaded the seireitei and there is no one who isn't bickering amongst themselves to defend our institution from his evil and manipulative ways?"

Shunsui raised an eyebrow at Jyuushiro, who rolled his own eyes in response. Really, the idiocy in here was almost as bad as the idiocy outside.

"Oh, I wouldn't worry. I think he's just talking to Captain Kurotsuchi about how the Twelfth division is standing up without him. Shunsui, go check, would you?"

Ukitake considered asking if one of them would give up a chair for him as they waited in awkward silence for Shunsui to come back. Seriously, he was getting tired, and his body wasn't what he used to be. That TB took it out of you something horrific. What ever happened to respecting your elders? And he was pretty sure that he was older than most of them, and it was meant to be age before beauty, wasn't it? And besides, he was prettier than them all as well! Err… handsome. Not pretty. Handsome. Yeah. When it became clear that Shunsui's return was not forthcoming, he considered and rejected the idea of sitting on the floor, and continued with his report.

"Anyway, not only is Captain Unohana unavailable, her Lieutenant, Kotetsu, is also currently out of action."

The voice of the group had his head face down on the table in front of him, already resigned to the reply that would inevitably send him one step further to insanity. That made him look up, though, obviously somewhat concerned about who would come to patch up his scrapes should the battles get out of hand. No, errm, he was concerned with the safety of the shinigami and- ah, feck it. Central46 were a pile of cowardly bastards.

"It would appear that herself, as well as her sister, Hinamori from the Fifth Division and Matsumoto from the Tenth have barricaded themselves in one of the old war bunkers in the centre of the Seireitei, and are unable to leave."

"Why in Gods name have they done that?"

"Well, I rather think that they don't _want_ to leave. Kusajishi seemed to think it was a good idea if they all played… hide and seek."

A collective shudder ran around the room.

"An understandable and tactical retreat. That sort of quick thinking should be applauded."

Another voice rang out from the darkness of the room.

"Commendable. Perhaps medals should be in order?"

Ukitake felt the urge to throw something at that voice rise in his head, but resisted. After all, he was a dignified and noble man. His own reply took on such a tone to match his stature.

"I believe that Kotsubaki was not so quick, and has already fallen."

"Good God man, that is your own third seat! Shouldn't you be more worried?"

Jyuushiro waved a hand around, vaguely.

"Oh, a couple of leg splints and he should be fine."

There was a momentary silence as Central46 stared down at him and wondered if he really _was_ the sanest thing that their ranks of Captains had to offer. Things really were in a bad state, if that was the case. The main speaker sighed, and waved his hand in Ukitake's direction in a deflective way that indicated that though he knew he would have to hear more, there was a part of him that wished that he didn't.

"Go on, what else?"

"Well, Lieutenant Kurotsuchi appears to have lost three limbs, and so-"

"What? How? What happened this time?"

"No, no. Once more, this _predates _this situation. I think it is the result of an interrupted experiment. You know, I don't think that it is really relevant. Let's forget about that whole nasty business- its probably better for you not to know about it."

"Of course. Yes. So, could you explain to us… what is that noise?"

"You mean those screams, and the loud bangs?"

"Indeed."

"Well, I think that indicates the growing proximity that Kenpachi Zaraki has to this building."

"And… why is Zaraki advancing on us?"

Ukitake wondered if they would be offended if he asked for a glass of water. This whole thing was rather starting to hurt his throat. He was pretty sure that they didn't want him hacking up blood on them, after all.

"Well, I think his own fight has ended now. Those seated officers may need medical attention, by the way."

"That still doesn't explain why Kenpachi Zaraki is coming towards _us_, Captain."

"Well, he has decided that he should fight me. That was why those eighty-odd shinigami were sent to fight him, actually. The other Captains insisted that I should come here and request that he could be physically restrained by the Kido Corps."

"And the reason that you have only got to this issue now, when he is practically on our doorstep?"

"Well, you keep interrupting my report, sir. This has gone on quite a bit longer than I assumed it would. You seem to need a lot explaining to you, but then I suppose you are all rather new. You may not have quite got to grips with the temperaments of the various members of the Gotei13, as of yet."

"Is see. Well, I would say that Zaraki could be restrained, but I must say, it is a little late for that, now. And is he vying for power?"

"No."

"… Are you?"

Ukitake raised an eyebrow.

"No."

"I see. Then why does he wish to fight you?"

Ukitake shrugged, shuffling the papers in his hands.

"The urge to fight is rarely logical. From what I can tell, the bout currently going on between Lieutenants Kira and Ise started over a disagreement about how best to order paperwork, following a conversation about how such matters should be handled now that the Captain-Commander is not here to counter-sign important documents. I think that Kira favours post-it notes, whilst Ise likes to colour coordinate. Paperclips, I think, also raised some sort of problem."

"Are you telling me, Captain Ukitake, that two of our Lieutenants, including one who is currently handling a division without a Captain and one who is credited to be one of the most responsible… that these two are fighting over paperclips?"

"Well, I hear that ring bingers were something of an issue, as well."

The woman sitting to the left of the main speaker nudged him, and whispered something into his ear.

"According to my assistant, that out of the twenty-one highest ranking shinigami in the Gotei13, there is only one that you have not yet commented upon. Tell me, where is Byakuya Kuchiki in all of this? I am not afraid to admit that I had assumed that it would have been him, if not you, who would have been here."

"_Scatter, Senbonzakura_."

The roof of the building was ripped off in a whirl of pink, and the stoic Captain of the Sixth stood there, frowning down upon the flabbergasted and disturbed looking members of the esteemed Central46.

"Kyouraku! Finish our fight!"

"Captain Kuchiki! He is not here! He left before!"

"Please, control yourself!"

Byakuya turned a thunderous glare down upon the man, and Ukitake hid a smile. He knew well that Shunsui had been hiding for quite some time. Urahara balanced on the edge of the broken roof, waving down at him. Or at least, he did for a moment, before jumping out of the way of the monstrosity that was Mayuri's zanpakuto.

Jyuushiro heard the close-by roar of a challenge from Kenpachi, and sighed.

It appeared that the rest of his report would have to wait.


End file.
